Vanpocalypse Soon in Timonium?

With The Maryland State Fair snagging Justin Bieber at the very most opportune time in his career (the next time he plays a state fair, he’ll know he’s on the back-side of the fame curve), the chances are better than average that this could lead to Baltimore County’s most memorable traffic implosion ever.

Consider the facts:

  • There’s not even enough parking at the fairgrounds to handle an average slow afternoon when the only attraction is sheep-shearing and watching green-faced teens lurch off the Zipper ride, looking desperately for a trash barrel.
  • The Light Rail swoons into its Victorian Fainting Couch whenever demand rises from the “Ennui” level to “Mildly Interested.”
  • Many of the concert-goers are too young to drive or take public transit by themselves anyway, so there could be a massive line of minivans and Priuses waiting to disgorge Princess and her friends at the gates.

If my paranoid reverie is too much, there’s always the much more even-handed preview from Timonium Patch, which outlines what to expect when Bieber Fever hits the Infield.

If nothing else, it should be fun to watch. From a distance.

(Photo: Creative Commons from flickr user Daniel Dionne.)